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Tag Archives: Elena Kagan

Elena Kagan, Obama’s Fundamental Transformer on the Court

It was April Fools Day, 1998, and the Senate Commerce Committee had just voted 19-1 to pass sweeping anti-tobacco legislation. On the dais where senators had just voted and were still milling about, the White House domestic policy advisor steering the bill for Bill Clinton threw her arms around the committee’s Democratic staff director as the two celebrated an historic victory for health, for the children, and for the latest incursion by the government into the private sector.

The Clinton advisor was 37-year-old Elena Kagan, a passionate, brilliant advocate for her boss’s liberal social policies. I was there that day covering the proceedings as both the White House and tobacco legislation reporter for my publication, CongressDaily. It was unusual to see such open, public emotion by staffers.

The bill would ultimate fail on the Senate floor. Some of my sources told me they felt it was pushed too far to the left by Kagan. I can’t say for sure if it’s true.

What I can say is that when President Obama appointed her to the Supreme Court in 2010, he had it on good word from the Washington Democratic establishment that he was elevating someone committed not just to this or that legal principle, but to the Democratic policy agenda.

Kagan Obama

Kagan had never ruled in a case before, because she has never served as a judge, a highly unusual thing for a Supreme Court pick. Before Obama made her solicitor general in 2009, she’d never in her professional career argued a case in court. Any court. She’d pretty much either worked for Clinton or been in academia.

Most practicing attorneys and judges must learn to put their own feelings in check as they serve clients or try to fairly administer the law. Kagan had none of this experience. What she had were opinions. Liberal opinions.

And that, apparently, is what Obama wanted, and what he got. Kagan, according to SCOTUSblog, has voted the most frequently of all Justices with Ruth Bader Ginsburg – 94 percent of the time as of June 2014.

So I wasn’t the least bit surprised to read that during oral arguments Wednesday over the latest Obamacare challenge, Kagan expressed her annoyance with the whole thing. A “never-ending saga,” she said wearily and derisively of the Obamacare cases.

Kagan may well have a fine legal mind. But she is also steeped in an ideology extraneous to the law. Unlike Republican presidents, who have been unpleasantly surprised by the thinking of their Supreme Court picks, there will be no regrets for Obama. He chose her because she had a lot of a ideology and far fewer qualifications, just like he did when he became president.

With Kagan now just 54 years old, America will for many years to come have to endure another predictably liberal Justice.

But not just any other liberal Justice. She’s smart and agressive, and is viewed as the next great driver of liberal opinion on the Court. Maybe even Chief Justice one day. All the while dedicated to enshrining from within the judicial branch Obama’s dream of fundamentally transforming America.

Obama Hands Power to Bill Clinton

Having just yesterday hired Bill Clinton’s OMB director, Jack Lew, to be his own, President Obama today handed the whole White House to Clinton, saying he will just let the ex-president run the country while he spends the next two and a half years perfecting his golf game.

Obama, who has complained that he is hooking most of his tee shots, headed immediately to Andrews Air Force Base to work the driving range before putting in 18 holes. He will technically remain president but focus most of his energy on golf and basketball.

Obama golf
Obama gets right down to business

“This job is a real pain in the ass,” Obama said in a written statement. “And apparently, it comes with a mother in law.”

Obama’s mother in law, Marian Robinson, lives with the first family in the White House.

Analysts were not completely surprised. Almost every senior adviser of Obama’s has roots in the Clinton administration, including Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, top White House economic adviser Larry Summers, Treasury Secretary Tim Geithner, Lew, Emanuel, and on and on.

“The president thought, we’ve got the whole Clinton administration working here, it just makes sense that we get Clinton too,” said White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs as he handed the key to his office to Mike McCurry.

Informed of the decision by White House Chief of Staff Rahm Emanuel, Vice President Biden remarked, “This is a big fucking deal,” adding that Clinton “is articulate and bright and clean and a nice-looking guy.”

Biden was then told to resign immediately so that Elena Kagan could take over as vice president.

“What the Hell, if she’s qualified to be Solicitor General and a Supreme Court Justice, I guess she’s qualified to do this,” Biden said. “I have no idea what I’m doing anyway.”

Emanuel agreed with Biden and told him to get out.

A request by former Vice President Al Gore to be considered for the his old job was rejected when he vowed to set the West Wing AC unit to 80 degrees fahrenheit.

“Besides, we couldn’t have two sex maniacs bouncing off the walls around here,” commented a senior administration official.

Bill Clinton
An exuberant Clinton is escorted back into the White House by Secret Service agents

Clinton arrived at the White House today for a meeting with Obama, Biden, and some business leaders. When Clinton entered the Oval Office, Obama told him, “Take it. Just take it.”

As a condition for getting the job, Clinton will be required to wear an ankle bracelet that will detect the presence of Viagra or Cialis in his system. Any trace of either and Obama will put Kagan in charge.

“Since his heart surgery, the former president needs the assistance of pharmaceuticals to get himself into trouble,” said a senior White House official briefed on the matter. “The bracelet will ensure that there are no more Monicas.”

The idea for the bracelet came up when Clinton today made a pass at the Oval Office receptionist, according to this source.

Secretary of State Hillary Clinton swiftly vowed to start setting her own foreign policy.

“I know the truth behind all Bill’s lies, misdeeds, and paternities,” she said. “I’m  sure he wants to stay out of jail. He knows who wears the pantsuits around here.”

The Nine Things Elena Kagan Wanted to Say

It was really difficult for Elena Kagan to sit there in front of the Judiciary Committee for three days and pretend she had no opinions. As anyone who knows her will tell you, she has lots of opinions. In an exclusive interview with White House Dossier this morning, Kagan listed for us the nine things she wishes she could have said.

1. I read the Roe v. Wade decision aloud to my nieces and nephews at night.

2. There will be no more clinging to guns once I get in.

3. I damn well can force people to eat fruits and vegetables and I will.

4. I totally favor property rights, which is why I think everyone should have them.

5. I’m not a lesbian, and by the way that new Massachusetts Senator is totally hot.

6. I believe in strict constructionism, you know, when it comes to coffee tables.

7. What the Hell kind of name is Orrin Hatch?

8. Remember that stuff I said about nominees needing to be more forthcoming? Bwahahahahahaha!

9. Senator, how the fuck should I know?

Elena Kagan Confirmation Hearing, Take 1

We listen now as Judiciary Chairman Sen. Patrick Leahy (D-Vt.) and ranking member Sen. Jeff Sessions (R-Ala.) begin today’s confirmation hearings for Supreme Court nominee Elena Kagan.

Leahy: Welcome to today’s hearing, at which we will grill nominee Elena Kagan about her qualifications for serving on the Supreme Court. I expect this hearing to be revealing and informative, especially since Ms. Kagan has herself written that Supreme Court nominees should be forthcoming about their views.

Now, I want everyone on this committee to vote to confirm Elena Kagan. Elena Kagan is a superb intellect, a woman with a long history of saying smart things, she’s not lesbian, she’s very smart and studied hard, and her students just ADORED her at Harvard. She also loves the military, and what woman doesn’t love a man in a uniform? I heard she was considering asking the entire Harvard Law School student body to enlist.

While it’s true she has little of the usual experience we expect of a Supreme Court judge, she’s a great gal. I think it’s imperative that we let her serve on the Supreme Court in order to give her some experience before she begins praticing law.

Thank you. Sen. Sessions?

Sessions: Thank you Mr. Chairman.

Elena Kagan is a first class Commie bitch and is probably a lesbian despite what she claims. I myself am attracted to a man in a uniform, but that doesn’t mean I didn’t prevent military recruiters from enlisting Harvard Law School’s sissy asses into the military, which I didn’t because I’ve never even been to Harvard.

As a Supreme Court Justice, Elena Kagan would take away all of America’s guns and give them to the unions, who would use them to shoot aborted fetuses to make sure that they are dead. Worse still, her taste in clothes is terrible and she’ll probably wear gray Mao suits to the Court every day and read passages from Das Kapital from the bench. She has to be stopped, and I don’t mean maybe. And now I’d like to do a little dance.

Leahy: Sen. Sessions, we all enjoy your dancing, but could it wait until after the hearing?

Sessions: OK, Mr. Chairman, but with your permission I’d like it entered into the record that I wanted to do my little dance at the start of the hearing.

Leahy: So be it, Sen. Sessions. Now, on to the questions. First, of all, Ms. Kagan, it’s a pleasure to have you with us.

Kagan: Thank you very much for having me here.

Leahy: Now Ms. Kagan, you would never do anything wrong on the Supreme Court or anything to upset anyone, would you?

Kagan: Thank you very much for having me here.

Leahy: And all of you opinions will be very carefully thought out and written with nice penmanship, won’t they?

Kagan: Thank you very much for having me here.

Leahy: And my staff tells me that you own only one Mao suit, and that you almost never wear it, isn’t that true Ms. Kagan.

Kagan: Thank you very much for having me here.

Leahy: I have no further questions. This hearing is adjourned.

Kagan: Thank you very much for having me here.

Sessions: Excuse me, Mr. Chairman, if I may, shouldn’t the Republicans get to ask some questions? I reject this attempt to railroad this nominee through the committee.

Leahy: Do you really think it’s worth it?

Sessions: Well, um, well, I’m told CNN has blocked hours of coverage for this and has no stories in the can to replace it with. Also, my constituents have written to me specifically requesting red meat. I mean, Mr. Chairman, we have a show to do.

Leahy: You know, the sooner we adjourn, the sooner you get to do your little dance.

Kagan: Thank you very much for having me here.

Leahy: Excuse me Ms. Kagan, but please don’t interrupt U.S. Senators while they are engaged in an important colloquy. Now, what do you say, Sen. Sessions?

Sessions: Well, gosh, OK.

Leahy: Good. This hearing is adjourned. Please clear an area in front of the rostrum for Sen. Sessions to do his little dance.

Kagan: Thank you very much for having me here.

Obama Celebrates Jewish Voter Month

Wait, wait, wait, wait. My eyes are getting so bad. It says “Jewish American Heritage Month.”

Will this help give the prez license to F with Bibi without losing the Cleveland suburb Jews? Time shall tell.

From the White House on this afternoon’s gathering, which should be wrapping up about now:

Approximately 200 guests are expected, including a range of community leaders and prominent Jewish Americans from professional athletes to Members of Congress, business leaders, authors and military veterans, among others.

Members of Congress Expected to Attend: U.S. Senate: Benjamin Cardin (D-MD), Dianne Feinstein (D-CA); Al Franken (D-MN); Frank Lautenberg (D-NJ); Carl Levin (D-MI); Arlen Specter (D-PA); Justice Stephen Breyer; Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg; Ambassador Michael Oren; Solicitor General Elena Kagan; Retired MLB star Sandy Koufax.

Also more than two dozen House members – Eric Cantor, not.

The Top Ten Lies a President Must Tell

The nomination of Supreme Court nominee Elena Kagan gives us an excellent opportunity to ruminate on the topic of presidential misspeaking.

Kagan continues to troll the halls of the Senate office buildings making “courtesy calls”  to various senators, eliciting positive noises even from some Republicans like Maine moderates Susan Collins and Olympia Snowe. This can only juice bellyachers on the left who fret that because Kagan lacks a “paper trail” she may screw them once she’s on the court and pull weird shit like overturning Roe v. Wade.

Let’s be clear about one thing: Elena Kagan is going to vote so hard to sustain Roe that she’s going to knock the pacemakers out of half the Justices on the Court.

Kagan is fully known by all the Clintonista’s who worked intimately with her during the last Democratic administration and who now serve their new master, Obama. Several were recently corralled by Obama’s spin machine to correctly disabuse everyone of the notion that she might be a centrist.

And no one in their right mind believes Obama would ever appoint someone to the Supreme Court who might for a nanosecond think about overturning Roe v. Wade. Which brings us squarely to the topic at hand.

When any president nominates a Supreme Court Justice, his ideological opponents ritually demand that he declare there be no “litmus test” for the selection. And then he ritually pretends that there is none. Liberals, it appears, get greater psychic gratification out of this hollow exercise than conservatives, parading around their false assurance like cleanly carved scalp.

To his credit, Obama seems a little uncomfortable saying something he knows CANNOT POSSIBLY BE TRUE, stammering that he won’t have a litmus test but then making absolutely clear that he will.


Lying is an important part of what makes any politician successful. When they get to be president, politicians must continue lying to stay on top, keep fit, and have a successful presidency. Obama’s statement leads the following list of the Top Ten Lies a President Must Tell:

1. “I have no litmus test for my Supreme Court nominee.”

2. “I have a plan to balance the budget.”

3. “I have a plan for peace in the Middle East.”

4. “Mr. Prime Minister, the United States deeply values its relations with the Republic of Cameroon.”

5. “I haven’t formally decided yet whether to run for reelection” (first term only).

6. “I wouldn’t mind being a one-term president if it means doing what’s right” (first term only).

7. “This is not about me, it’s about the American people.”

8. “I’m pleased to welcome the Republican (or Democratic) leadership to the White House.”

9. “I support a strong dollar.”

10. “Politics has nothing to do with this.”