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Twelve Things to Say to Infuriate Your Liberal Christmas Guests

You know who they are. They’re siblings who believed their professors in college. They’re in-laws you can do nothing about. They are “friends” who secretly think you are a mindless, evil philistine.

These liberals love to ruin your dinner with sanctimony and moral superiority. Well, on the theory that the best defense is a good offense, here are 12 things you can say to pre-empt the inevitable attack.

1: Did you know that the earth hasn’t really warmed for almost 20 years?

2: So, how much did your health insurance premiums go up this year?

3: Would you mind if 20 young, male Syrian refugees moved into a rooming house next door to you and your children?

4: What’s worse, an 18-minute gap in a tape recording or 30,000 missing emails?

5: How’s the Obama presidency been working out for black Americans?

6: Donald Trump is worth $4 billion. How much are you worth?

7: Who’s smarter, you or Ted Cruz?

8: What are you doing “owning” on land that belongs to Native Americans?

9: Which president has the worst average GDP growth per quarter in the postwar period, Gerald Ford, Jimmy Carter, or George W. Bush? (Answer: None of them, it’s Barack Obama with an average rate of 1.78 percent, according to U.S. News & World Report)

10: Did you know that the immigration enforcement authorities removed 76,000 criminals apprehended at or near the border or other points of entry this year?

11. Would you rather experience a terrorist attack in a place that allows concealed carry or one that doesn’t?

12. Merry Christmas!

This version of this article also appears in PoliZette.

55 Responses to Twelve Things to Say to Infuriate Your Liberal Christmas Guests

  1. Thanks for the talking points……I’m heading off for Christmas Eve lunch/dinner (whatever it’s being called!) and I will be the only non-lib in the house! Cheers!

  2. Does it bother you that President Obama has not personally commented on the 6 American soldiers killed this Wednesday in a suicide bombing. I guess our Commander-in-chief is busy playing games in Hawaii.

  3. The assumption that we all sit around discussing politics in a quiet and thoughtful manner is hilarious – it’s whomever can yell the loudest who wins the argument.
    Actually, we all avoid politics, Kardashians, gay anything, jihadists, and other MSM fave topics. We ask – how’s the job hunting going, no flu yet?, how’s Gramps/Gramma doing, where to get the cheapest car battery/tires, and football.

  4. I think we lucked out this year. As far as I know, none of our Lib relatives are happy with BHO, and NONE of them can abide Hillary. In fact, we haven’t heard a peep out of them for the last two years!
    This year, it will probably be all things Trump!

    Wishing for Peace on Earth, and Good Will to All!

  5. Excellent list! Unfortunately, or fortunately, we don’t have anyone to discuss this with over dinner. #’s 3,4,5 and 11 get my top vote. :)

    Merry Christmas to all. Wishing you all peace, happiness, love and joy.

  6. I wasn’t looking for trouble. Just shutting my computer down. And I see this. It is utter crap, especially the sequestration part — Obama blaming Republicans is the underlying message.

    It is so damned disrespectful. Who is the Secretary repesponsible for this? We know who the President is that is responsible.

    What other President has used the military for his political battles by disrespecting them so publicly and personallly. These are funerals. These are families.

  7. Keith, thank you for asking but I think the weather on the east coast addresses your idiotic right wing nutjob climate change talking point. Have a nice day.

  8. Keith, thank you for asking about my wealth. This matter has been understood for…oh I don’t know… at least 2500 years. Here’s what Aristotle had to say about the subject. “The type of character produced by Wealth lies on the surface for all to see. Wealthy men are insolent and arrogant; their possession of wealth affects their understanding; they feel as if they had every good thing that exists; wealth becomes a sort of standard of value for everything else, and therefore they imagine there is nothing it cannot buy. They are luxurious and ostentatious; luxurious, because of the luxury in which they live and the prosperity which they display; ostentatious and vulgar, because, like other people’s, their minds are regularly occupied with the object of their love and admiration, and also because they think that other people’s idea of happiness is the same as their own… In a word, the type of character produced by wealth is that of a prosperous fool.”

  9. Keith, I’d respond to more of your bear-baiting but my bleeding heart liberal wife and I are headed to the assisted living facility to care for a disabled resident we’ve been caring for for the last 2.75 years. I’d love to argue with you and your petty bunch of followers more but I’m afraid this other stuff is far more important that dealing with your BS. Have a nice day though.