In the history of mankind, many republics have risen, have flourished for a less or greater time, and then have fallen because their citizens lost the power of governing themselves and thereby of governing their state. TR


White House Mice Attack Fox News

The Fox News booth in the basement of the White House press room is under siege, with multiple, apparently fearless – and possibly Socialist – mice taking up residence in the area and crawling up the walls and across keyboards.

The mice, according to informed sources, materialize during daytime and appear to be unfazed by the presence of Fox News producers and correspondents with mousecide on their minds. Nor do the rodents – described as small, grey, and fast – appear the least bit interested in mousetraps that have been set around the booth.

More than one mouse is involved, as two were seen crawling on a wall at the same time, suggesting a possible conspiracy.

Suspiciously, the CNN booth, which is right next to Fox’s, has not had its defenses breached by a single mouse, prompting questions among veteran, unserious reporters about whether White House Press Secretary Jay Carney is indoctrinating mice to despise free markets and releasing them late at night in the Fox booth.

Understandably rattled Fox News reporters summoned White House officials to the basement this afternoon for urgent consultations, receiving soothing assurances that the toughest anti-mouse measures possible will be implemented expeditiously.

White House sources say a ban on swiss cheese is not at in the “toolbox” of measures under consideration, though sanctions freezing the U.S. accounts of any mice that can be identified and a controlled release of ┬áhungry, feral cats are possibilities.

Okay, that last paragraph’s not true.

Fox Senior White House Reporter Ed Henry this afternoon tweeted out in frustration.

Screen Shot 2014-03-18 at 2.03.37 PM

Henry kindly allowed White House Dossier to snap this shot of him attempting to get some work done just moments after a mouse sighting. A mousetrap sits undisturbed to Henry’s left on the floor.

Photo by Keith Koffler
Photo by Keith Koffler

Below is the hallway in the basement, where mice have also been spotted. The CNN and Fox news booths are down the hall and to the left.

Photo by Keith Koffler
A mouse.


NOTE: This mouse is not under suspicion of having participated in the raid on the Fox News booth.

White House Dossier will update its readers if there are further developments and will report promptly on any casualties.

29 thoughts on “White House Mice Attack Fox News”

  1. Oh, cute mouse ! However, it seems like the grand old White House needs a cat. Those pampered Portugese waterdogs aren┬┤t of any use if they live in the WH at all. I remember a photo of your cats, Keith. Two big strong cats. Maybe you could offer their services ?

  2. The last photo in your article of a rodentine creature is incorrectly labeled. Instead of the label “A Mouse” it should read “A White House Pool Reporter”

  3. Once again I will ask…

    Why is there a “White House press pool” if they do no work??? (re: ask the Obama regime REAL questions)

    At this rate the whole WH press pool/sycophants can be eaten by mice-rats, etc. and I would not care, because I would not not miss anything.

    (no offense Keith :-)

  4. Is that a glue trap next to Ed’s left foot? Who’s gonna’ smash the little fuzzbull when he gets stuck ?

    Not normal for these critters to be out in the daytime, especially not skittish either?

  5. This is America! Those mice have every right to be in the WhiteHouse, just as the Obama dogs.
    No crime has been associated with their presence there in the FOX enclave, and to assume that they might commit some offense is a violation of their civil rights.
    The very thought of killing these innocent Americans just for being where they’re not wanted is the same as the KKK’s mindset years ago.
    These American mice have the right to be anywhere in our great country they choose, unlike the illegal aliens from foriegn lands who infest every city.
    STAND UP, America. Save the American mouse.

    1. Mice are very good of traveling though basements, attics, inside walls, etc. Why is Mo coming out and saying, I need to cancel my trip, and oversee catching these american mice?
      We can always find a nice place for them.
      The mice might be bugged, so everyone who can’t possibly use their common sense, can find out what questions they are working on.
      The mice also may be bugged to find out personal info on the reporters, so they can tell them to shut up or we will release your personal information.
      I do not know how to bug a mouse, nor understand how they are keeping them only in one area.

  6. They’re hiding from the farmer’s wife who lives in the private quarters upstairs;
    She tried to cut off their tails with a carving knife…

  7. it’s obvious the mice were trained and put there by the Zionist Entity, which has already been sending clever sharks and seabirds to spy on the Blessed Iranian Regime, may nuclear peace be upon them.

    either that or the Fox reporters are leaving crumbs around the office.

  8. Solutions:
    1. Issue a strongly worded warning.
    2. Draw a red line.
    3. Feed them and make them your friends. Attach tiny go-pro cams to their tiny backs and send to the oval office.
    4. Rat poison (or school lunch menu food) – PETA be damned.

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