A waiter at Chef Morimoto’s in Honolulu has given White House Dossier a list of resolutions President Obama was working on for 2014 when he and the first lady dined at the restaurant while on vacation.
The president inadvertently left the list on Morimoto’s Grand Ocean Liner Sushi Boat, which featured a dazzling array of over 150 pieces of fish flesh. The waiter, a fan of White House Dossier, noticed the list on the ship’s bridge and decided to provide it to White House Dossier instead of Obama.
We share with you here the top ten resolutions found on the list.
1. Start work by 10:00 am no matter what.
2. Only tell lies when it’s absolutely necessary.
3. Fire Sebelius – as soon as she turns over my college records.
4. Stop short-changing myself on golf.
5. Extend an olive branch to Republicans and then smack them over the head with it.
6. Stop taking crap from Michelle, assuming she doesn’t mind.
7. Get the Choom Gang back together for one last blow out in Colorado.
8. Stop forgetting to give Biden his milk in the morning.
9. Stop cracking joke in front of Michelle about going to South Africa “just to grab a Danish.”
10. Admit Obamacare doesn’t work and get started with single payer!
Please let us know if you are aware of any further Obama resolutions.