As of now, I am in control here, in the White House

Top Ten New Anti-Romney Attacks Planned by Obama

The Obama campaign and its allies have accused Mitt Romney of outsourcing jobs, cheating on his taxes, helping kill a woman, and so forth. Even independent news outlets have judged much of this to be ridiculous.

But it’s only the beginning. The slanders against Romney are about to get darker, as the Obama camp starts resorting to telling the truth about the presumptive Republican nominee. And the truth will really hurt.

Here, according to sources within the Obama campaign who have been given World Series tickets to make them talk, are the top ten planned Obama attacks. Romney, these attacks will say . . .

1. Once killed a lobster at a Boston clam bake.

2. Kicks his horse in each of its sides to make it go faster.

3. Is privately engaged in a heterosexual relationship with his wife.

4. Doesn’t have a single Native American ancestor.

5. Went to business school.

6. Believes America is better than other countries.

7. Sexistly holds the door for women and uses demeaning language like “ladies first.”

8. Had five sons without bothering to have a single daughter.

9. Regularly deducts mortgage payments and charitable contributions from his taxes.

10. Has the nerve to think he’d be a better president than Barack Obama.

“The outrage of it all,” said one Obama insider. “What’s worse, it’s all true. Game, set and match – Obama.”

Share on FacebookTweet about this on TwitterShare on RedditShare on LinkedInEmail this to someone

21 Responses to Top Ten New Anti-Romney Attacks Planned by Obama

  1. – actually believes he entered business to be REALLY successful -kept his school report cards -believes facts are more important than distortions and second hand rumors -carries his teleprompter in his head -knows that 104 days of golf (three months of lost workdays) is too much for a POTUS in three years and five days of going to Church is not enough -is not going to name his dog Mister (MR) when BO departs the White House –will remove the “King” sign on Obama`s restroom

    • Says he’s an expert on the Winter Olympics but he’s never curled or luged.

      Raised by a Mexican

      Thinks its ridiculous to suggest Puerto Rico should be one of the 50 states.

      When he Jetskis he makes his wife drive. How dare he!

      • He once ate a potato.

        He is a human being.

        He is a toobaphone.

        The OBAMAMAMANANCIACS are SUCH MORONIC ManiACS! HEHEHE

        HAHAHAHA HEHEHEHEHE

      • The curling is really going to hurt Romney’s chances. I mean what kind of man can’t sweep a broom at a large object on the ice?! Certainly not
        qualified to get that 3am call that’s for sure!

  2. I was almost wary of reading what new horrors can be pinned on MrR. whew!

    He has never admitted to smoking marijuana or snorting coke.
    He bought his wife two Caddilacs and paid for them in cash.
    He left his wife alone when he went to work, leaving her to manage the children and household by herself all day.

    • Sadly as a woman it pains me to say that Mrs Romney will hurt his chances. Really a wife who loves her husband and cares more for her sons and less about spending as much time as possible sending money
      on clothes, vacations and making despairing rembarks about the flag
      and our country I mean is that what we want for a First Lady?

  3. Guys (and occasional gal), I think you are missing the point. Everything Obama’s campaign has said about Romney thus far is true to the tee (and not tea as in tea party, bunch of rhinos they are). He is an egalitarian technocrat hellbent and giving his “cronies” tax cuts while piling the middle class high with “fees,” otherwise known as poor people voter id poll taxes. Obama is an American born patriot, raised in Hawaii, who attended high school in Maryland, university at Harvard, and law school at the University of Chicago. He served in the military for four years, before receiving a purple heart for saving the lives of his crew mates. “Romney Hood” is a tax dodging egotistical, soulless millionaire. Obama is not a millionaire. You “Fox News” dumbos better learn some facts. Pick up a book, besides the Bible, and READ IT. MORONS.

    • Obama served in the military? Hahahahaha, Purple Heart? That is an insult to real veterans and current military who have been injured.

    • Obama is an American born patriot, raised in Hawaii, who attended high school in Maryland, university at Harvard, and law school at the University of Chicago. He served in the military for four years, before receiving a purple heart for saving the lives of his crew mates.

      I want some of whatever you’re smokin!

      • Well this ‘occasional gal’ s going to have to throw the hooey card on that! He can’t get Commander-in-Chief or ‘corpesman’ right oy. I’d also
        like whatever you’re smokin..for medicinal reasons only.

    • First of all, Obama went to high school in Hawaii, Columbia University and Harvard Law. Affirmative Action got him into the last two on that list. He never served in the military and certainly never saved anyone. And, FYI. you don’t get the Purple Heart for saving anyone, you get it for getting wounded. And as for “fees” and such, look at the new Obama regs for business, lots of new fees and forms to fill out. Each form takes time, which costs the business owner money. So take your ridiculous story and stuff it where the sun doesn’t shine. That is where it belongs since that is where it came from.

    • He served in the military for four years, before receiving a purple heart for saving the lives of his crew mates.

      Is this being said somewhere? Is it the “jump the shark” part of your lying post — or is this the part that proves that you were being sarcastic all along???

  4. With the ad about Romney killing that guy’s wife now backfiring on Obama, you never know what this fool president of our’s will do

  5. Obama is an American catastrophe. The OUST OBAMA COALITION wants to make sure that in November we have someone who will lead us, not subvert everything that made this nation great. Google us, visit the website and join. All we ask is a little bit of your time. God bless.