As of now, I am in control here, in the White House

Canines Beware! Obama May Run for Dog Catcher

President Obama Tuesday threatened to run for dog catcher, a prospect that should send the nation’s canines running for cover.

Here’s what the president said at a fundraiser in Austin, according to the White House transcript.

THE PRESIDENT:  Now, Texas, let me tell you, this is my last campaign.

AUDIENCE:  Awww —

THE PRESIDENT:  No, it’s true.  Unless I move down here to Austin — maybe I — (applause) — run for dogcatcher down here or something.  (Laughter.)  This is most likely my last campaign, win or lose.

Obama, as he revealed in his autobiography, tasted dogs while a child in Indonesia.

White House Dossier has no specific information to suggest that Obama would do anything with the dogs he catches other than bring them directly to the pound. But some dogs understandably may not be eager to risk other outcomes.

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21 Responses to Canines Beware! Obama May Run for Dog Catcher

  1. That “this is my last campaign” schtick is getting tiresome. It’s always about him not what he can do for his citizens and country. Just “gimme, gimme, gimme”.

    He’s running like a bad House candidate.

  2. If Obama ran for dogcatcher and I were a dog, I’d run fast and far. Maybe his dogcatching vehicle would be one of those lunch trucks that sell food on the streets?

  3. “C’mon Coach, don’t take me out of the game now. I know what I did wrong.
    C’mon, this is most likely the last time I’ll be in the BigGame”.

    Pathetic, incompetent, nasty little man who wouldn’t make a good dogcatcher, if anyone was dumb enough to vote for him.

  4. He was trying to garner some sympathy for the mean things us nasty conservatives are saying about the poor little misunderstood tyrant. Unfortunately, the loons in Austin would elect him in a New York minute. They would gladly put their beloved pooches on the sacrificial alter for their exalted dear leader.

  5. I always said he wasn’t even qualified to be dog catcher. But he may be qualified to grade them for tenderness, flavor, and the like.

    Instead of saying “awww” when he said it was his last campaign, I would have been shouting “promises, promises.!”

  6. My dog, upon hearing of this possible threat to his well being, has refused to leave his bed in fear I will move with him to Austin. Actually, I think Obama is no more qualified to be a dog catcher than he is to be president.

  7. I’m thinking the dogs are safe. If it becomes his responsibility to catch them, they have nothing to worry about. When was the last time President Obama actually did his job?

  8. They are just rubbing our noses in it….
    like they did with:
    – Immelt as Chairman of Jobs Council – who ships all jobs overseas and pays zero corporate taxes
    – Life of Julia (Julia is main character in 1984)

    …they are the most arrogant, stupid, evil and DESTRUCTIVE, childish beings in our history