As of now, I am in control here, in the White House

Top Ten Other Great Men Who Tried Real Hard

As most of you probably know, we’ve gone from “The Greatest Generation” to the “I Tried Real Hard Generation.”

These days, everyone’s a winner, everyone gets a trophy and everyone gets an “E” for Effort.

Consistent with this new ethos, my sources within the Obama campaign tell me they are changing the campaign slogan from “Forward” to “I Tried Real Hard.”

Here is President Obama unveiling the new slogan:

Let’s remember, it wasn’t just on bipartisanship that Obama tried real hard. He tried real hard to cut the deficit in half, to get unemployment below eight percent, to spur serious economic growth, to bring down health insurance premiums – which rose instead – and to stop the parade of foreclosures.

Writing in The Weekly Standard, Peter Wehner fleshes out nicely the various promises Obama tried real hard to keep. But didn’t.

But Obama really is stealing – he’s not the first Great Man to have made “Tried Real Hard” his catchphrase. White House Dossier today poured through the history books and found famous quotes from ten other men of substance who felt the effort was all the mattered.

*********

1. Winston Churchill: “We shall try real hard to defend our island, whatever the cost may be, we shall try real hard to fight on the beaches, we shall try real hard to fight on the landing grounds, we shall try real hard to fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall try real hard to fight in the hills; we shall try real hard never to surrender.”

2. Martin Luther King: I have a dream that one day this nation will try real hard to rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: ‘We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are created equal.

3. Ronald Reagan: “Mr. Gorbachev, try real hard to tear down this wall!”

4. Julius Caesar: “I came, I saw, I tried real hard.”

5. Arnold Schwarzenegger: “I’ll try real hard to be back.”

6. Teddy Roosevelt: “Try real hard to speak softly and carry a big stick.”

7. Phillip II of Macedon: “Divide and try real hard to conquer.”

8. John F. Kennedy: “Let every nation know, whether it wishes us well or ill, that we shall try real hard to pay any price, try real hard to bear any burden, try real hard to meet any hardship, support any friend, oppose any foe, to assure the survival and success of liberty.”

9. George S. Patton: “Try real hard to live for something rather than die for nothing.”

10. Vince Lombardi: “Trying real hard to win isn’t everything. It’s the only thing.”

*******

Are there any others that you remember?

53 Responses to Top Ten Other Great Men Who Tried Real Hard

    • “Well y’know, I did try real hard. I think most people can see that I am a reasonable guy, even if they don’t like me. Y’know, I’m not some ideologue who signs whatever “pledge” a lobbyist shoves under his nose as if that lobbyist owned his soul or something. I mean, no one has ever said–no one–that behind the scenes I’m some sorta undercover asshole. Frankly, what you see is what you get.

      “So yeah, I’ve tried hard. But it takes two to tango, and the other side wants a cage match. Well, that’s fine, but that’s not government. In a time of economic crisis, just like in a time of military crisis, sometimes the other side has to fall in line and remember who the president is, and that they’ll get their shot again in four years, but in the meantime, y’know… let a brother lead, like he was elected to do.

      “It isn’t easy when you’ve got a Senate minority leader who says, point blank, that his party’s only priority is getting me out of office. I mean, doesn’t that sound like a party that isn’t putting the needs of the country first? Hey, America had just dodged a second Great Depression, but that didn’t mean we were free and clear. We’re in a situation where I need all hands on deck, and frankly, all I’m getting is the stink eye.

      “But hey, I’ve tried. Even when they’ve called me every name but ‘nigger’, even when they interrupted my State of the Union address and were passing around jokes about how my mother fucked dogs– I think you’d agree that, on balance, I’ve been pretty patient.

      “And look, I’m not even making a big deal of the fact that the other side’s candidate for president belongs to a weird-ass cult. I mean, given everything they’ve said about Jeremiah Wright and me being a closet muslim and all, you know darn well I am entitled. But I haven’t, and I won’t. Even now, I’m trying.

      “The other side…

      “…is NOT trying.

      “And that’s the real goddamn problem, blondie.”

  1. “I would prefer to try real hard not to.” — Bartleby (Melville)

    “Try real hard to be sure you’re right, then go ahead.” — Davy Crockett

  2. You can really tell an IvyLeague educated lawyer by the way they talk.
    If he’s not talking to the “folks” about “stuff”, or flailing at an imaginary opponent, then he’s whining and making pathetic excuses for his failures like he “tried really hard. Shame on him for looking for pity.

    If I ever get in big trouble, I want a lawyer from AnyState College who earned his spending money tossing pizzas on the weekend.

      • How could I forget that? It had to be the stupidest thing to say when he was advising taxpayers how to spend their “windfall”. There is no thingamajig on your furnace that one can change and we all know that.

        That brings to mind MrsO’s creepy fundraising letter where she relates that her husband always shoveled the snow off of her car so that she could go to work. She didn’t realize that she was admitting she was the breadwinner and he had no job at that time.
        On another creepy level is her admission that he “tucks” her into bed at night. We must assume that he tries really hard but the best he can do is tuck her into bed. mybad

        • That was creepy. I think happily married couples do nice things for each other every day without blasting the details to the world, let alone the First Lady.

          Even good friends don’t share these sort of details of humdrum daily life of shoveling and tucking ;)

  3. If I ran the Romney campaign I’d publish Obama’s daily schedule all the while showing Obama with his feet propped up on the desk ans use Obama’s own words that he tries read hard.

    He complains the Republicans won’t work with him. If I recall during the Obama Care discussions he made the comment to the Republicans,.”I won” which to me meant he did not have to compromise.

  4. George Bush ACTUALLY said to Michael Brown after Katrina “Heckuva job, Brownie. You tried real hard!” but the media cut it short………

  5. I do solemnly swear that I will try real hard to faithfully execute the Office of the President of the United States, and will to the best of my Ability try real hard to preserve, protect and defnd the Constitution of the United States.

    Barack Obama, unilaterally and silently modifying Article II, Section 1 of the United States Constitution

      • That second, private swearing-in never did set well with me. I thought at the time that something was up. Are there any pictures or video of this second swearing-in? On what book did he re-swear? Why were they so insistent on it being private instead of broadcasting it from, say, the Oval Office or East Room or something?

        You would think that with something as important as the Oath of Office, especially so “historic” as one as this, they would either memorize it completely or at least write it on the back of their hands or something to make sure they get it word perfect. Maybe they didn’t quite have TOTUS up and running that morning . . .

        • Heard John Roberts was so full of himself swearing a president in for the first time in his life, he thought he could do it without any note cards and he flubbed it. What a couple these two turned out to be…a fraud swearing in another fraud. Neither of them took their oaths to heart.

  6. LOL! this is perfect

    put into those quotes you can see how pathetic that phrase is

    p.s. trying doesn’t count (or is that bully talk?)

  7. “Be it so. This burning of widows is your custom; try real hard to prepare the funeral pile. But my nation has also a custom. When men burn women alive we try real hard to hang them, and confiscate all their property. My carpenters shall therefore try real hard to erect gibbets on which to hang all concerned when the widow is consumed. Let us all try real hard to act according to national customs.” — Charles Napier

  8. “Try real hard to never give in. Try real hard. Try real hard, try real hard, try real hard, try real hard–in nothing, great or small, large or petty–try real hard to never give in, except to convictions of honor and good sense.” — Winston Churchill.

  9. “If you can try real hard to keep your head when all about you
    Are losing theirs and blaming it on you……….
    Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
    And — which is more — you’ll be trying real hard to be a Man, my son!”

    (With apologies to Kipling.)

    • Apparently President Obama believes Amerians will not elect as president a person who is or appears to be better educated and better spoken than they are. Obviously, he does not agree with Richard Nixon’s observation that Americans elected John Kennedy president because Kennedy was viewed as what Americans wanted to be while Nixon was veiwed as what Americans were. The use of improper English also is part of President Obama’s lead from behind philosophy. Pursant to that philospohy he wil employ the language the least educated among us would use.

  10. So in everything, try real hard to do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets. ~ Jesus Christ

  11. Very good.

    I would wager, however, that you “pored” through the history books. “Pouring,” after all, is for liquids. Merely a nit, but worth picking.

  12. “Try real hard to not interfere with anything in the Constitution. That must be maintained, for it is the only safeguard of our liberties.”

    – Abraham Lincoln

  13. “I have full confidence in your courage, devotion to duty and skill in battle. We will try real hard to accept nothing less than full victory!”

    – Gen. Dwight D. Eisenhower

  14. “No bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. You win the war, by trying real hard to make the other poor dumb bastard die for his country!”

    – Gen. George S. Patton