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Top Ten New Obama Deficit Proposals

President Obama is under fire for criticizing the dramatic spending reductions in the House Republican budget while failing to propose major cuts himself.

White House Dossier has discovered that the White House is about to respond by releasing a new list of cuts it believes will solve the deficit problem and preempt further criticism of the president.

Through the judicious use of force and threats, White House Dossier has obtained the list. What follows are the top ten ideas on it.

1. Shrimp cocktail served at White House dinners will continue to have cocktail but no shrimp

2. Instead of using a 16 car motorcade, presidential golf excursions will employ a 15 car motorcade.

3. World’s sea lanes to be kept open by new specially outfitted fleet of rowboats.

4. Guests who steal White House silverware will be prosecuted.

5. Biden to be charged every time he says something stupid.

6. No one gets Medicare benefits unless they know “the magic word.”

7. Carney to charge admission to the briefing while deputy press secretaries man a candy stand.

8. Bo to switch from Science Diet to Purina.

9. Go from taxing everything that moves to taxing many things that don’t move as well.

10. First ladies and presidents must travel on vacation together instead of on separate Air Force jets.

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35 Responses to Top Ten New Obama Deficit Proposals

  1. All Michelle’s clothes will come from the Goodwill stores or Salvation Army.
    Her jewelry will be handmade by children who will sell them on the front lawn
    of th WH.

    • #6 is scary. I don’t’ know any secret words.

      They could have a yard sale of all that really old furniture sitting around the White House.

      • Yeah who wants all those pricey irreplaceable antiques anyway they are
        just old relics that remind the hip and cool Obama’s of America ewww.

      • I bet they’d keep the secret word locked in a safe,like the KFC or Coke recipe. Only two people would know. That way nobody would receive Medicare benefits. Money saved from Medicare could go toward MO’s weekly travel expenditures.

    • No chance for solar power at the White House. The algae king has been dragging his feet on his commitment to re-install Jimmy Carter’s solar panels on the White House roof since day one. The narcissistic demagogue likes his creature comforts.

  2. Do-it Yourself surgery kits.

    *10% discount for Democrats

    *FREE for bundlers

    (Hoodie,rubber gloves and instructions not included)

    All airports to include a golf course.

    Move SCOTUS into the West Wing.

      • Get rid of half the czars by making them double date with half of Moo’s handmaidens..They will fall madly in love and elope to Greenland, no one will notice their absence .

        • Didn’t you and Perry Mason represent the falsely accused in many court cases? Why can’t all lawyers be like Perry?
          I think that you and Perry would probably lose if you tried to defend Obama in any case.

  3. Kobe beef and lobster will be served only to Mr and Mrs Obama at official dinners. All other guests will receive a small ration of bread and weeds from the garden with recycled tap water as the beverage of choice.

  4. Sorry, Keith, but I don’t find this humorous at all.
    I guess, I was erroneously expecting a higher level of analysis from the WH Dossier.

  5. My sense of snark has not kicked in today, so all I can add is to start charging government officials full price for their use of military or government aircraft when used for personal travel.\

    Panetta repaid the Treasury approx. $32,000 for personal travel to his California home via military transport, but the cost to the Air Force is estimated to be $860,000 in actual operating expense. (http://apnews.myway.com/article/20120405/D9TV27HG1.html)

    Monkey see, monkey do!

  6. Aution off all of Michelle’s tax funded purchases for the last three years at Democratic fund raisers. This should almost pay off the national debt and all by Democrats,— it’s a win win.

  7. Item 5: Biden to be charged every time he says something stupid. Wow, this could be the answer to resolving the national debt. Should take, maybe worse case, three to four weeks.