Mitt Romney has put together a secret list of reasons why, if he is the Republican nominee, he can defeat Obama in the general election. Romney plans to refer to this list constantly, using it to perk him up when the going gets tough.
A Romney campaign official shared this list with White House Dossier. He insisted his name be withheld in order to discuss internal campaign matters and so Romney doesn’t kick him so hard in the ass that he would be unable to sit down at his desk for a week.
Here then, are the top ten reasons Romney thinks he can win this fall:
1. He has Utah completely locked up.
2. Obama is weakened by vegetable diet forced on him by Michelle.
3. Trump endorsement will add at least 15-20 votes during the general election.
4. Mormonism allows him to promise the country two and even three first ladies.
5. Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus, and Biden is from Saturn.
6. He won’t make McCain’s mistake of being a genuine person.
7. His campaign is preparing new challenge to Obama’s legitimacy to be president based on where he was conceived.
8. Plans not to select Dan Quayle as running mate.
9. Feels certain he can out-Tweet Obama any day of the week.
10. Is in possession of Obama’s college records, including term paper titled, “How I plan to establish a Communist paradise in the United States during my second term as president.”