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Obama Fails to Go Golfing

by Keith Koffler on December 27, 2011, 8:23 pm

Updated 9:32 pm ET

President Obama failed to go golfing today, deciding to snorkel in Hunauma Bay instead. White House Dossier has dispatched a team of investigators to find out what went wrong.

From the pool report:

At about 1:20 p.m., the motorcade left the president’s rental in Kailua and made a scenic, windy drive about 40 minutes to Hanauma Bay, a popular snorkeling spot. Arrived at 2 p.m. Under sunny skies with faint breeze. Per WH official: the first family is here with the president. No sighting of him or them. This park is closed every Tuesday for maintenance and beautification so first family had it to themselves and entourage. Pool is holding at visitor’s center.

David Nakamura
The Washington Post

More on this tragic story as details emerge.

An update from the pool:

The First Family released four green sea turtles today in Hanauma Bay.

The turtles are all 18 months old and were all born on June 26th 2010 at Sea Life Park.

Unique fact: Sea Life Park is the only place that raises green sea turtles in captivity in the US.

All four of the turtles were identified with distinctive markings and have microchips in their rear flippers with a unique ID so they can scan them if them come up on the beach and ID that turtle.



TexasFred December 27, 2011 at 8:32 pm

There’s NEVER a hungry shark around when ya really NEED one… :(

cheryl December 27, 2011 at 8:58 pm

That’s pretty funny. I couldn’t top it if I tried.

Mark Davis, MD December 27, 2011 at 9:02 pm

Most of us would like 17 minutes in Hawaii, Obama has 17 days at our expense. This may be the most expense vacation a sitting president ever had on the public dole. I would be happy to kick in more money if he retired there NOW. MD

Janice/Granny Jan December 27, 2011 at 9:46 pm

Microchip? It’s to keep track of their November 6th, 2012 vote. After that the turtles are expendable.

Star December 28, 2011 at 10:48 am

Good one.

jeff December 27, 2011 at 10:27 pm

He just snuck over to get drunk n smoke with Nancy in her suite and make a plan on how to wreck the country faster next year, and to appoint a vacation czar

GWShrub December 27, 2011 at 10:39 pm


Janice/Granny Jan December 28, 2011 at 12:02 am

Yes, he is a Nancy boy.

Lizzy December 28, 2011 at 2:10 am

Thanks that’s a polite term for what use in private:)

srdem65 December 27, 2011 at 11:13 pm

An unidentified man and a woman believed to be his accomplice were spotted inside Hanauma Bay park this afternoon throwing objects into the ocean. The objects were later discovered to be endangered baby turtles that the pair of intruders stole from the Sea Life Park incubators in a misguided attempt to set them free from captivity. The turtles can be identified by a microchip inserted into their tiny bodies and a secret GPS nodule attached to their feet.
The US Coast Guard is now actively searching for the turtles so as to return them to their captive habitat.
An BOLO has been issued by the Secret Service for the intruders who illegally entered the park and when captured will face a large fine.
Anyone seeing this couple, rumored to resemble the Obamas, should call their local police department with the information.

Keith Koffler December 28, 2011 at 7:40 am

Someone catch these people!

Snake Plissken December 28, 2011 at 12:42 am

Is Reggie “Body Man” Love along on this vacation? Maybe there was no one around to clean any debris from Obama’s golf cleats necessitating a postponement . . . . Michelle wasn’t available since she was busy “caring for everybody” . . .

Star December 28, 2011 at 10:50 am

Snake! I loved that movie.

Lizzy December 28, 2011 at 2:09 am

Oh the humanity!

A.Men December 28, 2011 at 7:40 am

Another punch to the gut to American taxpayers from President-In-Name-Only and Moochelle.

DeniseVB December 28, 2011 at 8:00 am

I must say, it’s nice they picked a day the park was closed, though why a 40 minute trip to snorkle? Their beach house was described as having some of the best snorkling w/green turtles too. How many cars did the entourage require? Did we pay for the gas?

Do pool reporters have any curiousity at all? heh, heh.

qestout December 28, 2011 at 8:01 am

Keith, how many people in a “pool”? Are they “fun”? Found this:

“Obama also made himself available for a photo opp, according to a pool report:

At 5:25 p.m. pool was hustled down a hill for glimpse of POTUS. We heard what sounded like seals, though our view inside Sea Life Park was obstructed. We waited 10 minutes until POTUS emerged with a gaggle of youngsters, including daughters Malia and Sasha, whose hands he was holding. Malia was on his right and Sasha on left. The other youngsters were described as “friends,” by a WH official. POTUS wore white t-shirt reading Island Snow, black shorts/bathing suit, black baseball cap and flipflops. Malia wore striped red and white shirt and green shorts and Sasha was sporting a white T with a picture of John Lennon.

Obama ignored a shouted question about Yemeni President Saleh”s request for a visa and said only:

“Okay, guys, good to see you. Hope you’re having fun.” … Group headed
into waiting vans as one precocious child observed out loud: “IT’S THE PAPARAZZI!”

Susan December 28, 2011 at 9:00 am

Oh my…the press pool being called the paparazzi by a young child. What an insult to the elite news club. The child heard that word from some adult, which just goes to show the high regard the Obama’s and their friends hold the WH press pool.

Anonna December 28, 2011 at 10:34 am

How many of the “friends” the Princesses Obama did we pay to fly in? Or are they part of the 1% who seems to have come with the Obamas and rented houses nearby to the Hawaiian Palace?

DeniseVB December 28, 2011 at 8:22 am
Susan December 28, 2011 at 10:21 am

The way he’s looking at his daughter gives me the creeps…

Star December 28, 2011 at 10:54 am

I never held hands with my Dad after age 4 or so–but don’t go by me…

DeniseVB December 28, 2011 at 8:33 am

About Sea Life Park….Mrs. Obama missed a fun time !

Anonna December 28, 2011 at 10:37 am

She had some personal surgery and botox shots scheduled.

Anonna December 28, 2011 at 10:38 am

When you’re a sow’s ear parading as a silk purse, lots of maintenance is necessary.

Lizzy December 28, 2011 at 11:14 am

I think HRH is staying away from hubby as I still think this marriage is
a sham she’s being paid $4 million to play happy families.

Star December 28, 2011 at 11:22 am

My sister and Mom’s caregiver were all gooey yesterday over how much in luvvvv they were. I just sat there almost gagging. The carergiver said he was sooo handsome, he was her fantasy. Fantasy what, I wanted to say, but refrained.

Lizzy December 28, 2011 at 1:28 pm

Poor you they make me sick. You know the lovely tablecloth
dress (sleeveless) cost $2000 now isn’t that special?:(. The one she wore to church whoever said her arms were toned should be sent to Gitmo.

Star December 28, 2011 at 1:40 pm

I said to my sister (who only reads Ent Weekly and People and scans the paper, never TV or internet news) that the Obamas snipe at each other, shoot glares, make disparaging remarks (he smells, she dives on food like a crazed wolverine, something like that) and sis said, “They’re teasing. That is what lovers do.” I can’t win–now I just clam.

Lizzy December 28, 2011 at 2:18 pm

Boy can you imagine the fights they have should be on
Pay Per View:). She would scare the daylights out of me I’m sure she keeps him in line he’s such a ninny.

Star December 28, 2011 at 2:32 pm

I dunno, they both can wield those baleful looks pretty darn well.

Car in December 28, 2011 at 8:40 am

I want to amend my golf guess – 92 was based on him leaving when originally planned.

I figured the girls have school, right? What’s more important – Obama vacation or their school?

Boo December 28, 2011 at 10:05 am

Car in – Michelle can fly back separately to get the girls in school while BO stays another week or so.

Car in December 28, 2011 at 10:10 am

Wow, you think he’d do that? Place your bets, folks.

Lizzy December 28, 2011 at 11:14 am

In a minute.

Star December 28, 2011 at 1:42 pm

BO the man or BO the double dog?

Lizzy December 28, 2011 at 2:52 pm

There’s a difference?:)

Star December 28, 2011 at 3:37 pm


Car in December 28, 2011 at 8:45 am

From Insty:

. “The White House plans to ask Congress by the end of the week for an increase in the government’s debt ceiling to allow the United States to pay its bills on time, according to a senior Treasury Department official on Tuesday.”

While he’s in Hawaii? really? This is just unbelievable. ask for it while he’s away, so hopefully no one associates the over-spending, NON-cutting habits that have occurred under his tenure. Unbelievable.

DeniseVB December 28, 2011 at 8:56 am

I thought Congress was gone through the first week of January?

Rick December 28, 2011 at 9:18 am

Keith, are we SURE about the turtles’ birth data? I understand Hawaii has some difficulties properly recording and documenting births.

Anonna December 28, 2011 at 10:39 am


RWC December 28, 2011 at 10:08 am

So, who is in the entourage that I am so happily paying for?

Lizzy December 28, 2011 at 11:16 am

If we are paying we should know but as but a few brave souls the MSM
would cover for anything they do dangerous.