As of now, I am in control here, in the White House

A Wonderful White House Story

Last Monday was a beautiful day in the Rose Garden. President Obama and his Teleprompter began to speak about the American Jobs Act, which they said would create . . . jobs.

Obama speaks in Rose Garden

 
The three men ruining running the economy, National Economic Council Director Gene Sperling, OMB Director Jack Lew, and Treasury Secretary Tim Geihtner, listened obediently.

Sperling, Lew, Geithner

 
These are their shoes.

 
Suddenly, Right Teleprompter wasn’t delivering the correct words anymore. All Obama could see were the lyrics to Van Halen songs. That couldn’t be right! He paused, not knowing what to do.

 
After a few seconds, the president became confused and started spouting weird gibberish, like Rick Perry.

Obama flubs

 
Valerie Jarrett got herself a good laugh out of it.

Valerie Jarrett

 
The lighting guy really couldn’t care less. Just as long as the light was good. He got a kick out of climbing up his ladder and saying, “Let there be light.”

 
Watching back in his office, Boehner had his usual reaction.

 
Then, Obama looked and realized Left Teleprompter had the speech. He began again to speak confidently.

Obama and his teleprompter

 
Later, briefing reporters, Tim Geithner suddenly realized the American Jobs Act wouldn’t create any jobs at all. But how could he tell everyone?

Tim Geithner

 
Jack Lew frowned, knowing something was terribly wrong.

Jack Lew frowns

 
White House Press Secretary Jay Carney, understanding that Geithner had finally run the numbers through his head, knew he had to prevent him from speaking. He gave the Treasury Secretary his Vulcan Sleeping Stare.

Jay Carney

 
The stare immediately put Geithner to sleep.

Geithner sleeping

 
Lew, not realizing what was happening, began singing loudly to Geithner to awaken him.

Jack Lew

 
Geithner suddenly awoke, startled and unsure, but remembering nothing about the funny numbers.

Geithner unsure

 
He reported that the American Jobs Act would indeed succeed, and everyone who is out of a job began to cheer.

All photos except Boehner and Qaddafi by Keith Koffler

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16 Responses to A Wonderful White House Story

  1. OMG…just when I thought my day could not get any worse, after trying to bathe a 60 lb rottie “pup”….I had the greatest laugh of the month….TY you sooooo much Keith….you keep me relatively sane ( relatively……just sayin’ )

  2. Wow, Sperling can’t even figure out that you never wear brown shoes with a black suit, and yet he’s running the world’s largest economy? No common sense = no sense at all.