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Obama Says, Punish Your Enemies!

“If Latinos sit out the election instead of saying, ‘We’re gonna punish our enemies and we’re gonna reward our friends who stand with us on issues that are important to us,’ if they don’t see that kind of upsurge in voting in this election, then I think it’s gonna be harder and that’s why I think it’s so important that people focus on voting on November 2.”

– President Barack Obama, Monday, October 25, 2010

The Scene:

President Obama has invited three leading Republicans – Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell, House Minority Leader John Boehner and former House Speaker Newt Gingrich – to the White House for what he has told them is a meeting to “reset” their relationship and start afresh. Also on hand is White House Chief of Staff Pete Rouse and Senior Adviser David Axelrod.

Boehner: Mr. President, thank you for gathering us here at the White House to meet with you prior to Election Day. It’s a tremendous gesture on your part.

Obama: Bwahahahahah.

Boehner: Excuse me Mr. President?

Obama: Nothing. I just thought of something funny that happened on the fourth hole Sunday. Please continue.

Boehner: This is really very presidential of you.

McConnell: Yes, I agree with Leader Boehner. I hope that this will start us on a new path that will allow us to work hand in hand for the American people.

Obama: Bwahahahaha.

Boehner: What’s going on Mr President? What is Secretary of State Clinton doing at the door with a paddle.

Obama: Axelrod?

Axelrod: Mr. Boehner, the president is revamping his image and political strategy, as I’m sure you’ve noted from the brutal attacks on the GOP over the last few weeks. We’ve decided to move from Hope and Change to Punishment and Retribution.

Rouse: We’re . . . we’re pretty pissed off at you guys.

Obama: We tried to work with you, and all you did was sit on your fat Fascist asses and watch the economy fall apart. And now it’s time for your punishment

Axelrod: Punishment. Punish the enemy!

Rouse: Punish! Punish them!

Rahm: Punish!

Boehner: Rahm? What is Rahm doing here?

Axelrod: He flew in all the way from Chicago when he heard there was going to be sadistic mistreatment of Republicans at the White House.

Gingrich: Sadistic treatment? This clearly stems from your anti-Colonial world view and your atavistic desire for revenge on the imperialists who seized the country of your father and – Owwww! – Hillary, what are you doing??

Boehner: Hey! She just whacked Newt’s ass with that paddle.

Obama: Mr. Gingrich, bend over to receive your punishment.

Gingrich: No . . .  Owwwww!

Obama: Then take it standing up. Whack him again, Hillary.

Gingrich: Owwww!

Rahm: This is SO GREAT!

Rouse: Punish the enemy!

Gingrich: Owwww!

McConnell: Look, Al Gore!

Obama: That’s right. Hello Mr. Vice President, it’s a pleasure to see you.

Gore: Glad to be back at the White House, Mr. President.

Obama: McConnell, since you won’t bring cap and trade up in the Senate, your punishment is to listen to Al Gore talk about global warming for a full half hour.

McConnell: Oh, no, please, please. Not that! Let Hillary smack me around.

Boehner: Mitch, easy  boy.

Obama: Guards, take Sen. McConnell to the White House theater.

Gore: I’ve got some wonderful new charts I’ve added to my PowerPoint that I’m sure you’ll want to see.

McConnell: Noooooooo! Get your hands off of me! Nooooooo! (his voice begins to fade as he is led away).

Obama: Boehner, we have a very special punishment prepared for you.

Boehner: Pelosi!

Pelosi: Hi asshole.

Obama: Boehner, the Speaker is going to be administering your tan today . . .

Boehner: Oh no!

Obama: While reading you the entire health reform bill.

Rouse: Punish the enemy! Punish the enemy, Mr. President!

Obama: Rouse, control yourself or I’m going to sic Bo on your cats.

Rouse: No, not my cats! My little pretties!

Obama: Boehner, you guys are real big on this “read the bill” bullshit, aren’t you? You should really enjoy this.

Pelosi: Come on asshole, we’re headed to the Green Room.

Boehner: Oh, the humanity!

Pelosi: Shut up idiot. Let’s go.

Obama: Ax, I’m really enjoying this Punishment and Retribution thing. What was that last line we had?

Axelrod: Hope and Change.

Obama: Hope and what?

Axelrod: Change.

Obama: Right. Let’s invite Rove and the president of the Chamber of Commerce over. This is just way cooler.

“If Latinos sit out the election instead of saying, ‘We’re gonna punish our enemies and we’re gonna reward our friends who stand with us on issues that are important to us,’ if they don’t see that kind of upsurge in voting in this election, then I think it’s gonna be harder and that’s why I think it’s so important that people focus on voting on November 2.”
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14 Responses to Obama Says, Punish Your Enemies!

  1. Keith, you need to be a writer on Comedy Central!

    That comment that Obama made to hispanics about voting brought back something from everyone’s favorite terrorist – Yassir Arafat. As everyone knows, when Arafat spoke in public to the international press he would speak ENGLISH and his comments were about peace, lateral political movement toward the center, Camp David, etc. When Arafat spoke to all-Palestinian audiences however the language used was ARABIC and the content was rated “R” for violence: death to Israel, Israelis, settlers, the Zionists, the Zionist state, “the blood of Palestinians”. It was black and white. Arafat said one thing in public and other, in private.

    Obama does the same thing. is very similar to this. He talks openness, love and warm fuzzies in public, but when speaking to his base, it becomes a race-based feeding frenzy: “punish” (caucasions); “typical white person” (caucasions), “the greedy bankers” (capitalism).

    He speaks as President in one fashion and then speaks as gang leader (of the Democratic Party) in yet another.

  2. Keith, I feel so upset that our President would talk like this that I was unable to read your comic piece on it. It’s rather like laughing at cancer. There are genuinely, inoffensive funny aspects, but it’s such a hard topic overall. We have a destructive force in the driver’s seat of our government. Will we survive or will be over-ridden by the hollowing out of the integrity of our election process, the legalization of millions of people from a neighboring, hostile nation, the balkanization of the American people into the American race-alikes and ethnic-alikes?

    Perhaps Obama is just saying what other politicians believe, but do not say. Is it better to be so politic or to just come out and say that you want power for revenge? Granny Jan’s video is very dark, but so is the situation.

    Obama has always said many contradictory things on subjects. I noticed it during the campaign. People clung to the opinion that they agreed with and ignored the rest. He has always gone for the direct message with his favored groups. Then he spreads some margarine-fake sweetness and light. Michelle Antoinette is even more two-faced in her “my people” versus her “American people” comments.

    I don’t think that I have ever heard The One say something about his pride in or love for our nation. Too bad for us that he took his anger at life and his need for a savior-like status and made it the foundation of a climb to the Presidency.

    • Anonna, thanks for this comment. I don’t blame you being upset by what he said. And you are right, there is an anger there that perks up now and then but is little noticed. I’m thinking of doing a piece related exactly to that issue.

  3. It’s more than just anger. Anger at injustice is a good thing usually. It’s rage–that baleful hate stare. Because his dad left? His Mom also left him with Grandma? His only friend, much older, was a Marxist guy supposedly giving him the black experience? That Wright character–or did he have the rage then find that church? Did he get scholarships, was he angry that he needed to get them? Did he have a bunch of friends at school or was he a cold fish? I am not a shrink…but he is prickly and full of rage–at this country, at anyone who questions him, at me personally in Chandler AZ, at everyone!

  4. I missed something that may be some sort of inside reference… Just who are the latinos ‘enemies’ that they are supposed to punish?? Enemies of voting latinos? Is he acknowledging and encouraging racial division or what?!?

  5. ok, still getting more angry about that dufus comment… He goes OUT OF HIS WAY to drag the whole ‘latino community’ (can’t we just call them ‘americans’?) in the wrong direction regarding racism just for his re-election prospects. Holy Moses (or should I say Holy Muhammed if I don’t want to get roughed up??) I thought this moron was supposed to bring us all together?

    Loved the analogy with Yassir! Exactly what he’s doing.