As of now, I am in control here, in the White House

Top Ten Things Obama Will Do When He Returns from Vacation

Note: This post was written while Obama was on his 2010 vacation to Martha’s Vineyard.

1. Start a lobster colony in the South Lawn fountain

2. Plant ice cream for Michelle in her vegetable garden.

3. Reach out to a Republican – and break his arm.

4. Open the South Lawn Driving Range for business.

5. Give Ahmadinejad just one more chance.

6. Tell Rahm to put some clothes on during senior staff meetings.

7. Announce the start of the Autumn of Recovery.

8. Suggest a compromise – keep the mosque where it is but move Ground Zero instead.

9. Start planning winter skiing vacation in Gstaad

10. Try to figure out where in the White House he left the Hope and Change.

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7 Responses to Top Ten Things Obama Will Do When He Returns from Vacation

  1. Loved these. I have one: “Toss the Niebuhrs and Franzens and get Frederick (The Day of the Jackel) Forsythe’s THE COBRA.” The president is black, Kenyan Dad, Kansas mom…I can’t read novels anymore (stupid eye doc tricks) and was listening to audio and when it got to that, I screamed! Is there to be no mercy? No compassion? People are trying to relax, Fred!

  2. 8. Suggest a compromise – keep the mosque where it is but move Ground Zero instead.

    Keith: This was both politically funny on the one hand (I let out a looooud bellyfull of Southern “jeeeeez!”) … but oddly Kafka-esque on the other (and therefore sobering) as it reflects the current thinking in the Obama White House and much of the MSM.

    Mr. Obama and his army of lawyers are probably laying the groundwork to moot Ground Zero, to wit:

    “Ground Zero will be, a specified location, enclosed between ___ Street and ___ Street, by said grid line apportioned according to New York City Landmark Building Code D-56309-c, Sec. 5, subsec. b. No monuments, flags, letters, memorabelia, gatherings, memorials, prayer meeting(s), or organized activity may take place within this specified Zone of Tolerance. Any activity outside the Zone is subject to prosecution.”

    • Tom,
      Funny you say that. It does represent a certain type of thinking that you see at the White House, that notion of bending reality to make a real problem appear to go away. And the problem when you get people too reliant on their attorney background – they think the maneuvering of attorneys represent reality. That’s how you statements like, “It depends on what the meaning of ‘is’ is,” which the speaker too completely seriously.