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The Obamas’ Simply Wonderful Vacation

President Barack Obama and Mrs. Obama, on vacation in Bar Harbor Maine, are dining together at the Luxurious Lobster Restaurant. The children are in the hotel room with their grandmother while the Obama’s take a moment of leisure together.

Barack: Excuse me waiter, you’ve given me drawn butter with this lobster. I asked for remoulade sauce.

Waiter: Remoulade sauce? The drawn butter is always served with the three pound lobster.

Barack: Well draw it right back and get me remoulade sauce.

Waiter: We don’t have remoulade sauce.

Barack: Have the chef make some.

The waiter withdraws to the kitchen.

Michelle: Oh Barry, the nerve of them. The president asks for remoulade sauce, the president gets remoulade sauce!

Barack: Exactly. How are your giant Atlantic scallops?

Michelle: Oh lovely! And they’re exquisite with this wine you ordered.

Barack: The 1962 Chateau de Nouveau Riche Côtes du Rhône. An excellent vintage and perfect for shell fish and mollusks both.

Michelle: Oh Barack, you are so refined.

Barack: I am so refined.

Michelle: You ahhhr. Can I show you what I bought today?

Barack: Oh, let’s wait until after-dinner cordials. (He now suddenly calls out to no one in particular). Hello? Can someone crack this lobster for me please??

Michelle: Let me show it to you. Oh please oh please oh please!

Barack: Well, OK.

Michelle: Look! A wonderful chapeau. I’ll put it on.

Barack: Oh bravo Michelle! Bravo!

Michelle: Oh, you like it! You like it!

Barack: I adore it. Incomparable. Now sugar plum, how much have you dipped into the Obama coffers, pray tell?

Michelle: Four thousand dollars.

Barack: Four thousand dollars? You’re finally cutting back! Ahahahahahahaha!

Michelle: Ahahahahahahaha!

Barack: Ahahahahahaha!

Michelle: Ahahahahahaha!

The waiter returns to the table

Waiter: Sir, some remoulade sauce made especially for you by the chef.

Barack: Well, I hope so!

Michelle: Ahahahahahaha!

Barack: Now take this lobster to the kitchen and crack it for me. Unfortunately this crustacean is not as thin skinned as McCain. Ahahahaha!

The waiter withdraws to the kitchen with the lobster. Suddenly, Cajun political strategist James Carville, who is in Bar Harbor soliciting funds from rich vacationers for a relief program for those effected by the Gulf oil spill, wanders over to the table.

Carville: Mr. President, Mrs. Obama, hello.

Barack: James! So nice to see you. Enjoying your vacation?

Carville: Well actually I’m not here on vacation. I’m soliciting funds for oil spill relief.

Barack: Oh that’s grand! Those people are having such a terrible time. I’ll have my accountant Larry Summers write you a check.

Carville: Well thank you sir.

Barack: No, no thank YOU! Wonderful work you are doing. Well, Michelle, I guess that means we’re skipping desert! Ahahahahaha!

Michelle: Ahahahahaha!

Carville looks a little stunned.

Carville: You know Mr. President, they could really use you down in the Gulf. I mean, with all due respect, Mrs. Obama, you told people to go vacation there, and you’re up here in Maine.

Barack: Well wait a second James, you don’t expect US to actually vacation there do you? The beaches are never as good as the one’s on the Atlantic coast. They’re filled with pebbles.

Michelle: And the only oil I’m getting near is the hotel bath oil!

Barack: Ahahahahahaha!

Michelle: Ahahahahaha!

Barack: James, it’s so hot and muggy in the Gulf right now. I mean, come on.

Carville: Well, Mr. President, it would have been a great show of solidarity with the people there. And other vacationers might have followed you. I mean, their economy is really in the tank, especially with the deep water drilling moratorium you imposed. Half the economy is based on the sea, and the people can’t even eat their own fish.

Michelle: That’s terrible. The people can’t eat fish?

Carville: The people can’t eat fish.

Michelle: Well, let them eat steak!

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10 Responses to The Obamas’ Simply Wonderful Vacation

  1. How nice and PC you are. In reality, the O’s, when not reading from a written script or teleprompter, verbalize like high-school dropouts. Ya’ knows, ums, ehhs, dropped ‘g’s’ and twisted sentence structure is their natural speech pattern.
    As for the sense of entitlement, you are probably right.